The marriage season is just over and you would have attended countless engagement ceremonies, weddings, and receptions. What’s common in all these: Hundreds of Food counters at the wedding with more food in the wastebasket than in the Chafing Dishes. Lacs & Crores are spent in these 5 days extravaganza – only for the simple stupid silly reason, “Arey Log Kya Kahenge, ek lote bete/beti ki shaadi bhi dhumdham se nahin ki. Kya Kanjoos Log Hai”
For families who have industries and factories churning out crores of rupees every month, this might not be an issue at all. But consider a middle-class Indian family where a man in his 50s has just paid the last installment of his Home Loan. Probably, he will take one more loan which will last until his last breathe just to make sure that his “relatives” doesn’t get offended in the wedding.
Think it from the perspective of the groom/bride who is in his/her 20s, probably scrapping the last EMI of an educational loan, seeking out a home loan because buying a home is must and on top of that burdened with the most unnecessary yet unavoidable expenditure of the wedding. Life shall always pass in chasing the EMIs – Isn’t it shocking? And all this for what again, “What Will people think of us? Or My parents won’t understand – It is their dream!”
What should one do?!
- Courage to stand up!
When one of the corporate honchos was mulling to ditch the corporate job for a more fulfilling teaching job, his wife said, “I am fine but What will the people say?”. He asked her, “Which people are you talking about? What matters to me is you, my parents, your parents, and my sister! You, I guess, are fine with it. So are my parents and sister. Now as far as your parents are concerned, I would like to talk to them about my aspirations and help them understand. I don’t think anyone else other than these people’s opinion really matters!” And he was right.
Are these people who we really worried about helping us when we go broke? No! Not really. It only takes one bold step. Momentary unhappiness is far better than ruing for next 5 years over why did you spend 50 Lacs for 2 nights when you could have purchased a decent home ( of course not in Mumbai!).
Parents, over the years, have become practical right from accepting love marriages to inter-caste, inter-religion marriages. They will get convinced for this as well.
Of What I have heard from elders is, “Weddings and functions are a way to give back to the society. In a lifetime, a person attends countless weddings and other family function and savour the delicacies. By organizing a function at our place on happy occasion, one ensures that it is giving back to the society.”
Agreeable – 100%
But if giving back to the society is the intention, I would rather donate 30% of the amount, which is earmarked for the wedding, for the education of orphanages. Can’t be nobler than that! Also, explain to them that it is better to donate this way rather than accumulating sins by wasting tons of food in just 2 nights.
- Save and Invest
Does it need a brainer? Investing 50 Lacs in Gold, property, Mutual Funds or even Fixed Deposit (sounds a bit old school) will fetch much higher returns than in a wedding function where people after having a wholesome dinner would say, “Rasmalai was a bit stale, wasn’t it?!”
- Take a trip of Lifetime
It is widely acknowledged and studies have confirmed too that experiences stay with humans forever. It is these experiences that make them rich. A decent trip to the rarely explored places on the earth can be accomplished under 10 Lacs for the couple. It is not only a nice way for the couple to bond but to share the ultimate experience.
- Invest in your business/dreams
I have witnessed innumerable occasions where parents have refused their children some amount to start their business, follow their passion because they have been saving this for marriage. God! Are you really serious?! Explain them – what is more necessary – your own happiness at the success achieved in business or some fake reputation?!
This whole affair is not easy with the emotion equation kicking in. But youth has always depicted the courage to go against the odds.
Cover Image: Wall Paper Craft